Lower Your Standards

I started my rotations at the hospital just over 2 weeks ago. The work is so enjoyable, but I am still overwhelmed. I chatted with the CathSorority girls about helpful ideas to keep my house clean. So many of them offered such helpful advice like:

• Set a timer for 10 minutes each day to clean
• Turn cleaning into play time, so my daughter can participate 
• Hire help (a girl can dream)
• Break up all the cleaning duties so it seems less intense through out the week

Then I had a realization, maybe my problem isn't that my house is too messy, maybe its that my expectations are too high. Perhaps now, is as good a time as any, to give myself and my family a break. 

I have been such a grouch lately. My poor husband got the brunt of it, when he didn't jump at doing the dishes, when I asked him at 10 p.m. one night. I was unreasonable.

On Sunday the parish priest used his homily to make such a profound statement. He said that some of the parishioners have come up to him and said that while they really enjoy his homilies, sometimes they wish he would use the homilies to convince the congregation to repent. 

The priest said that while repenting is important, he would rather his parish be a place of refuge. He said that the world is brutal and is always telling people what they are doing wrong. He wants the truth of the love of God to be spoken from the walls of his Church. The love of God will make people feel like they are home and cared for---and that will keep people coming back. 

I will say his philosophy certainly has worked on me. 

Given my recent overwhelmed state of mind, I realized that the statement the priest made can also be applied to each families' home. My worry and frustration causes my family to not want to be home or to not feel welcomed. 

Accepting imperfection, while trying to become better can make a home so much more welcoming. 

I'd rather a messy house, then a frustrated family.

When you are in a challenging season in your life, what expectations do you let go?

Year of Faith Series: Days in the Chapel

I started the Year of Faith Series as an attempt to further explore my faith and the teachings of the Catholic Church. Through this series I will dive deeper into specific faith filled moments in my life, teachings of the Church, and new ways to strengthen my faith. I'd love for you to join me in this journey throughout the Year of Faith, declared by Pope Benedict XVI. If you are interested in doing a guest post in the series about your faith journey please email me @coffeewithmamaleigh@gmail.com.

Shortly before we moved about a month ago, strangely, I found myself with some time to myself before I needed to pick my daughter up from preschool. I decided to head across the street to our Church. After circling the Church, trying every door, I realized that only one door to the entire building was open.

I made my way inside and just sat there for a while. I love going into Churches or chapels when they are empty, I always have.

Back in high school, when I coached volleyball for the local Catholic middle school I used to spend time in the chapel every day after practice. I did it out of habit, not because I was this devout Catholic. In fact at the time I was really struggling with my faith. I spent about 30 minutes every day in the chapel  with a note pad writing out plays and line ups for the girls. I'm sure that isn't exactly what God had in mind...

There is something about just showing up that God honors though. He knew I was coming to him for help, even though I never asked. He's smart like that.

It reminds me of when my mom would ask me to clean my room when I was younger. Reluctantly I always agreed to do it. I would tell her, "Ok, I'll do it. I won't like it though". Despite my attitude, just by going through the motions, my room eventually became clean.

I think God works the same way. I went to the chapel. I went through the motions. I told God, "I'll show up, but I'm not going to like it". But my heart became clean anyway. He worked in me, and made me believe. God dissipated my doubts. He made me trust in him and his timing. In the tiny chapel, alone, He gave me a sense of peace I didn't have before.

As I sat in the Church, kneeling before the Tabernacle, I remembered those days and thought about all the people in this world who could find a sense of peace and trust in God like I did, if only they'd show up.

As I left the chapel that day I felt myself wondering, "How do you convince people to just show up so God can work in them"?

The Day I Found Joy

Joy is Rising

We just moved into a new house over the weekend. The person who lived in the house prior to us subscribed to Good Housekeeping magazine. As I checked the mail for the first time, I was excited to find this delightful treat of a magazine- which I usually do not read.

The front cover caught my eye. One of the cover stories read: 7 Things ANYONE Can Do to Be Happy. As I flipped through the pages, I found the story. The quick read tells it's readers that to be happy one should:

• Appreciate significant others
• Be deliberately grateful for others
• Take a spiritual break (gives the example: deep breathing)
• Eat chocolate
• Set a bedtime for electronics
• Befriend themselves
• Get fitter in 40 seconds

None of these ideas are bad ideas. Relationships, exercise, gratefulness, deep breathing, and loving ourselves can bring us happiness. But when I look deeper into the meaning of happiness, I discover that happiness is not exactly what I am looking for. Happiness does not last over time. It comes and goes. 

My years in junior high and high school were spent searching for happiness. I tried to eat right, exercise, and look nice. None of which are bad things at all, but they didn't bring me lasting happiness. 

Near the end of my high school career I volunteered at an overnight camp for children with cerebral palsy. I was assigned a specific camper to take care of throughout the week. She was a 10 years old girl, who was significantly developmentally delayed, had little speech, was unable to walk, and needed help showering, toileting and eating. The girl was amazingly delightful to be around. She always smiled and thanked me for everything I did. 

The second to the last day of camp was the 4th of July. I pushed my camper outside to a large field where we had planned to watch the fireworks.  Many of the other volunteers where helping their campers get out of their chairs to sit down on the grass. I decided to do the same. The sky was starting to get dark around us and it was a little difficult to see. 

A few moments after I had helped her down to the grass and propped her into a sitting position, she started to scream. I had no idea what happened. The poor girl was unable to verbalize the problem to me. Then I noticed hundreds of ants crawling on and around her. I had unknowingly sat her in a fire ant pile! 

Immediately I called for the counselor, who was the head of my cabin. We picked her up and carried her to the nearby shower. I hopped in the shower with all my clothes on. She sat, naked, in my lap as myself and the other counselor washed away all the ants. 

 As the water soaked all my clothes I couldn't help but feel horrible! I couldn't believe all the pain I had caused this girl, when I was supposed to be taking care of her. Then she stopped crying and smiled at me. She said, "tate you, just a stake". She didn't care that it was my fault, she only cared that I helped make her feel better. She trusted me and knew I had not intended to cause her any pain.

Then she gave me an enormous hug and pooped on me. Myself and the other counselor laughed so hard we cried. Then I thought to myself, "This is joy". 

I am not sure at what point sitting in a shower fully clothed, soaking wet with another person's poop on me became one of the most joyful moments in my life, but it did. 

That day I discovered where true joy comes from. It doesn't come from looking great or eating better. The joy in my life comes from living beyond myself. It comes from living for others, which in turn is living for God.

It is true joy that can sustain a person, even in the messiest of times. With joy, the quest for happiness diminishes. We can find joy in each and every person we help. 

Where do you find joy in your everyday life?  

Clay Angel Ornament

When I was younger I loved sculpting things out of oven bake clay. I often made small animal figurines and beads. This year I decided to rekindle that old love of mine and make some ornaments for Christmas. I chose to make an angel because angels are so important to remember during Christmas, as well as everyday life.

Here is how I did it:

Sculpt about 1/2 a block of sand colored Sculptey clay into a head with a long flowing blob underneath it. (mine is about 6 inches in height) Then attach 2 long rectangles in the center of the back and have them meet in the center of the front of the body to make the arms.

Then free form the wings. Mine were about 3 1/2 inches in height.

Attach the wings to the back of the angel

Make a rectangle with rounded corners the same height and width of angel's body that extends below where the hands meet. Pinch the top of one end to make pleats.

Attach the skirt just underneath where the hands meet.

Make a small heart out of a piece of colored clay and attach it to the front where the arms meet. 

Make 4 long "snakes" out of brown (or whatever color you'd like) clay. Twirl them around a pen to make curls. Then attach them together at the top with 2 on each side.

Lastly I cut the top of a paper clip off with wire cutters and pushed it into the top of the angel's head to make a hook.

Then bake at 275 degrees F for about 30 minutes (or whatever the directions say). If you don't want your clay to show any finger prints in it, then I recommend lightly rolling over each piece with a rolling pin prior to attaching the pieces. I chose not to do this because I liked the handmade look.

These make perfect Christmas gifts or can be used in your own home on your tree.

Year of Faith Series: Angels Among Us

I started the Year of Faith Series as an attempt to further explore my faith and the teachings of the Catholic Church. Through this series I will dive deeper into specific faith filled moments in my life, teachings of the Church, and new ways to strengthen my faith. I'd love for you to join me in this journey throughout the Year of Faith, declared by Pope Benedict XVI. If you are interested in doing a guest post in the series about your faith journey please email me @ coffeewithmamaleigh@gmail.com.

One late afternoon I was driving home from undergrad. The gas light in my car went on about 15 minutes before I had arrived for class earlier that morning. I knew that I had had to stop to get gas before hitting the highway or I wouldn't make the 45 minute drive home. On top of that, rain was pouring down from the sky and I could hardly see out my window. In my mind I debated whether or not I should stop. The area around school wasn't particularly safe, but it also wasn't safe to run out of gas on the highway.

I had made up my mind and pulled into the nearest gas station despite the fact that it looked mostly abandoned. Just as my tank was almost filled a man, much larger than I, approached me. As soon as I noticed him, I scrambled to try to get the nozzle to detach from my car. I was not quick enough. He cornered me between my car and the station where the hose was attached.

"I am so sorry to bother you ma'am, but my arm is real hurt and I was hoping you could help me", he said. Glancing down at the arm he was holding, I noticed it was swaddled in dirty gauze. I did my best to decipher if it truly looked like a real injury. "Could you please drive me to the nearest hospital to get it checked out?" he stated while giving me a wincing smile. My mind was racing. Was this really happening to me? I gathered my thoughts and calmly told him that I was sorry about his arm, but that I wasn't able to give him a ride. We went back and forth like this for a while.

"You're just not going to help me because I am black!" he shouted at me. Outraged that I had just been called a racist by someone whom was possibly trying to harm me, I spoke without thinking. I stared him straight in the eyes and said, "This has nothing to do with you being black! I don't know you. I don't care what color you are, you are not getting in my car." He smiled, appearing to be fairly amused. Expletives mixed with prayers were racing through my mind. My fight or flight response was kicking in, yet I had no where to go and surely this was a fight I wasn't going to win. The he looked at me and said, "Ma'am, I am not going to ask you again, get in your car and take me to the hospital".

Just then a scruffy looking older man stumbled out of the gas station store drinking from a large brown paper bag. He stumbled over to where the man and I were standing. "Someone help me", I thought to myself.  "Leave this young lady alone!" he shouted at the man, slurring his words in the process. Then he looked at me and told me to take the nozzle out of my car and be on my way. I did as I was told. I could hear the two men arguing as I got in my car and locked the doors as quickly as I could. My entire body was shaking as I drove off. Before I made it onto the street, I turned around to take one last look at the horrible scene I had just escaped. The larger man was lifting up his arms to stretch as he was talking to the obviously homeless fellow. His shirt pulled up, just enough for me to see the handle of a gun sticking out from the top of his pants. My mind was in too much of a whirlwind to make sense of what had just happened.

Later that afternoon I told my mom the story, knowing that she would lecture me about getting gas in an unsafe area of town. Instead all she said was, "You must have one heck of a guardian angel". I hadn't thought of it that way before, but I knew she was right.

Ever since then, I have stayed in constant contact with my guardian angel and spent some time looking into the Church's teaching about them.

The Catechism tells us that, "From its beginning until death, human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession. Beside each believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leading him to life."- Catechism 336

My guardian angel sure got the memo about being my protector!

Angels also play an important role in Biblical history. They were there to close the Garden of Eden- after Adam and Eve betrayed God, they communicated the law to countless figures, helped out the prophets and the angel, Gabriel, even announced Jesus' birth!

St. Francis De Sales tells us" Make yourself familiar with the angels and behold them frequently in spirit; for without being seen they are present with you"-St. Francis De Sales

It is clear that angels are important: people mustn't forget about them. In my life, I have noticed that I can call on the angel assigned to me for practical help as well as in dire circumstances. I often plead with my angel to go talk to other people's angels. Although there is no official teaching about this, it does seem to be within their jurisdiction to do this. I have sent my angel to talk to my daughter's angel about giving her some comfort when she was waking up in the middle of the night. Miraculously the two times I felt desperate enough to do this, she calmed down within a few seconds and fell back asleep. I didn't even need to get out of bed.

I find myself feeling more spiritually connected, when I am in constant conversation with the angel assigned to me. It is so amazing to know that God assigned one specific spiritual being to constantly be by my side and to protect me. What an awesome gift! I have come to know that the power of angels is real.

In the words of Chris Tomlin, "I know Who goes before me, I know Who stands behind, The God of angel armies is always on my side".

Let us not forget our angels. Their feast day is on October 2nd and here is a petition written specifically  to them:

O most Faithful companion, 
appointment by God to be my guide and protector, 
and who art ever at my side, 
what thanks can I offer thee for thy faithfulness and love, 
and for all the benefits
which thou hast conferred upon me?
Thou watchest over me in sleep; 
thou consolest me when I am sad; 
though liftest me up when I fall; 
though avertest the dangers that threaten me;
though preparest me for the future;
though withdrawest me from evil
and excitest me to good; 
though exhortest me to penance when I yield to temptation
and reconcilest me to my offended God. 
Long since should I have been cast into hell,
unless by thy prayers thou hadst averted from me the angel of God. 
Leave me not, then, I entreat tee; 
but still comfort me in adversity, 
restrain me in prosperity, 
defend me in danger, 
assist me in temptations, 
lest at any time I fall a victim to them. 
Offer to God my prayers and groanings, 
and all my religious exercises, 
and obtain for me the great gift of final perseverance, 
and the grace to die in the friendship of my Creator, 
and so to enter into life everlasting. 

Amen. 
Credit: Prayer retrieved from http://www.catholic.org/prayers/prayer.php?p=845.

Has there ever been a moment in your life where you felt the presence of your guardian angel? What have you done to strengthen your relationship with your angel?

The Holiday Marathon

As we were driving home last night from dinner, I noticed something I hadn't seen in quite a while. It was the twinkling of Christmas lights that the door to a bank was so beautifully donning. I sat in the car in slight disbelief, as Halloween just passed only a few days ago. I love the Christmas season, but perhaps it is still a little bit too early to decorate for Christmas. We haven't even had the opportunity to celebrate Thanksgiving yet! I say this, being a firm believer in decorating for Christmas much before Christmas.

I still remember the very first Thanksgiving my husband spent with my family. The day after we all had stuffed ourselves with turkey we sat around the living room talking. I stood up and announced that I wanted to put the (fake) Christmas tree up. I was looking for volunteers to help me out! My husband sat there, shocked. I think he was seriously offended that I would instigate decorating for Christmas so early. He didn't expect that kind of behavior from me. He insisted that decorating that early made Christmas commercial, and took away the real meaning of Christmas. He explained that his family put up the Christmas tree MAYBE one week before the holiday. I couldn't comprehend why someone would want to wait that long.

This is a conflict that often many Christians face. Does it take away from the meaning of Christmas to decorate for Christmas so early? I am convinced that the real answer is: it depends. If it gets a family in the mood to only talk about presents and thinks about all the things they hope to receive Christmas morning, then yes it takes away from the true meaning of Christmas. But I still maintain that decorating (even a month) early can be a good thing.

After thinking about this dilemma a little too long, I have come to decide that decorating early can help a person prepare for baby Jesus to come and it can help a person become enthusiastic about spreading the meaning of Jesus' love. I know it gets me in the spirit of giving!

I once read this scenario:

If a you were to receive news that the king and queen of England were coming to stay in your house, you wouldn't wait until the last minute to scramble together some resemblance of hospitality. Most people would begin planning a menu, cleaning the house and making sure everything looked its best. There is no reason that the coming of Jesus, the greatest King of all time, needs to be any different. 

Now, I try to taper my excitement for Christmas at least until the first of December. Then I break out the advent wreath and petition my husband to agree to go get a tree. I make lists of carefully chosen items that I want to purchase as gifts for the ones I love. My mind often wanders to ways I can help others out. My excitement over flows when I get to fill my daughter's shoes with goodies on St. Nicholas Day. This year I am entertaining the idea of a Jesse tree. Mentally and spiritually I prepare myself for this amazing story that is the birth of God! And I also find the legend of Santa a fun one.

Both my husband and I now are better able to see that different people do things differently, and neither way is necessarily wrong. I like to show my enthusiasm for the birth of Jesus outwardly with decorations, as it helps me prepare. Still others find it easier to mentally and spiritually prepare for Christmas with out the distraction of decorations.

When does your family begin decorating for Christmas? How do you help keep your focus on the true meaning of Christmas?

7 Quick Takes Friday (7)

One: 
I hope everyone had a wonderful Halloween and All Saints Day this week. My daughter dressed up as Snow White for Halloween and I put together a Cinderella Pumpkin!

Two:
Last week I didn't have a chance to post much because I was completing a week long rotation in a school system. I had a great time and learned so much more about how public school systems are run (I always went to Catholic school). I think OT in the school system may not be for me right out of school. The OT I worked with did everything very much on her own. I'd rather have another OT around to ask a million questions!

Three: 
Last week I wrote about how I am making my way through my 20's and why I feel so fortunate to be living in them now. These years are ever changing and very humbling years. But they are also exhilarating!

Four: 
My prayers go out to the families who were hit by hurricane Sandy. Those that lost their lives and to those who lost their belongings and their power. 

Five:
We are on hopefully our final look for a rental house. We need to be moving in 1 month. Who knew finding a rental house could be so stressful and time consuming!

Six:
So many people around me are sick right now. If that is you, you may want to try one of these:

Seven:
 If you are looking for dinner ideas for this coming week, you may want to try out my Potato and Leek Soup! It is one of my favorites.

Head back over to Jen's for more quick takes!

Marrying Young: Grad School and Mommy Style

You can check out my first ever guest post for Mandi over at Catholic Newlywed! I am so excited to share it with all of you.  I wrote about my experience marrying young, having a child young and going to grad school. Here is a little excerpt: 

"The first few months were blissful, but challenging. There were small arguments about things like where the dishes should go after a meal. Then there was the fact that he liked olives on his pizza, and I think they are possibly the most disgusting food on the planet. "

If you are visiting my blog for the first time I am so glad your here! I encourage you to check out some of my favorite posts so far:  About Me,  Roasted Red Pepper Hummus, When To Buy Cheap, and When Not To, Sirach and Duties Towards God, and Wedding Rehearsal Ribbon Bouquet

I also love it if you would follow me!

Now I'm sending you back over to some of my favorite posts from Catholic Newlywed: Stay at Home vs. Working Mom, Mapping Your Love Story,  and Advice I Wish My Mom Gave Me Before I Got Married

Thanks for visiting! 

7 Quick Takes Friday (3)

Number One
The husband got a new job! We couldn't be more excited. We have been hoping and praying for this for a while. So we celebrated with a cake. (Purple, per request of my daughter)

Number Two
We have been talking to a realtor about renting a house in a few months. I am thrilled with the idea of moving into a house, not that I don't love the mold that has conveniently started to grow in our apartment...

Number Three
While I was in the kitchen making soup (pretending it was cold outside), my daughter was in the living room nicely playing. I turn around to see she has taken all of her stuffed animals out and was conducting a circle time. Her animals were working on learning their letters.

Number Four
Each animal got an individual blankie to hold onto for nap time, which would be held after circle time. Except blue puppy, "because sometimes friends' mommies forget to bring a blankie, then friends are so sad and cold".  Ahh I hope I am never that mommy! Although I have forgotten to send a change of clothes many a times...

Number Five
We have nothing planned for this weekend. Yay! We are thinking about going on mini hike at a near by nature preserve. We have to take advantage of the gorgeous weather we have been having!

Number Six
Speaking of great weather I have been working on decorating for fall. I have started a wreath and a centerpiece for the time. Neither of which have been completed. Shocking.

Number Seven
Have a great weekend! Do you have any exciting plans for the weekend? I'd love to hear about them.

Head back over to Conversion Diary for more 7 Quick Takes Friday.

Biblical Wisdom for Personal Finance

I find money frustrating, and I always have. With money, comes greed. Yet it is impossible to live in civilized society without money. I spend probably a little too much time thinking about money, trying to make the best use of what we have. I have searched countlessly for advice on the topic of personal finance. Then I though, what better place to look then the Bible? Here is what it says about money: 

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is life not more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important that they? Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your lifespan?"

-Matthew 6: 25-27

Wow! I couldn't think of a more powerful quote. While, it doesn't mention money specifically, it does bring up material possessions. It is so important that we put our trust in God, in everything. This applies to even our finances. God will provide for us, if we trust in Him. This can be so hard for me to do in my own life, because I always want to budget down to the cent. If we find ourselves with an unexpected situation like a flat tire, I find myself worrying the whole rest of the month about money. I need to remind myself that God says not to worry, and trust in Him. He will take care of us!

"Rely not on your wealth; say not: 'I have the power'."- Sirach 5:1

We again are reminded to trust in the Lord, and not in our wealth. Money gives us the illusion of power. But really, we have nothing without God. 

"Barter not a friend for money, nor a dear brother for the hold of Ophir."- Sirach 7:18

This is one of those quotes I wish I would have read long before I came across it. We shouldn't lend our family and friends money! This is hard for some people to hear, but it really is true. Lending family and friends money puts a barrier in between you and the other person. It can cause a lot of harm in your relationship. Now this doesn't mean that you shouldn't help out someone close to you who needs help. But maybe it means that you should help them out, without expecting return payment. 

"One man pretends to be rich, yet has nothing; another pretends to be poor, yet has great wealth. A man's riches serve as ransom for his life, but the poor man heeds no rebuke." - Proverbs 13: 7-8

What does this mean? It means we should live within our means. We shouldn't buy a home we can't comfortably afford, we shouldn't max out credit cards to give others the false illusion that we have money. We end up tied to our belongings and they really can't and won't serve us. On the flip side, if we have been blessed with wealth, we shouldn't flaunt it. It might be tempting to spend it all on really nice things, but we are told not to. We will find a much greater wealth in giving to others and finding joy in people and Christ, rather than stuff. 

"Behold, the wages you withheld from the workers who harvested your fields are crying aloud, and the cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord of hosts."- James 5:4

We should be generous with the money we do have! If we go out to eat and the waiter serves us well, we should tip them well. If we have a hard working babysitter that lovingly watches our children, we should pay them well. If we are in a position of management we should pay our employees well. 

What are some of the biggest lessons you have learned in your own life about personal finance?

7 Quick Takes Friday (2)

One
This week I made these yummy fajitas!

Two
My little one gets to come to school with me today! I couldn't be more excited. She of course is going to be a test subject for all my classmates in my pediatrics class.

Three
Speaking of her, we made these lion masks, and had a blast doing it.

Four
Check out my some of the guidelines I follow for budget grocery shopping

Five
My daughters turning 3 at the end of the month. I literally cannot believe it. Someone, I don't know who, let her in on the surprise. She has since been requesting balloons and a butterfly cake. I might just have to make one. We are still debating the birthday party situation, as of now, I am thinking maybe next year...

Six
I signed up to volunteer in between some of my classes to go to the hospital for 1 hour and hold newborn babies. I couldn't be more excited. I also find it completely heart breaking that no one else is there to hold these babies...

Seven
Even after this post, I still feel like I need to find a good cleaning schedule that works for me.

Don't forget to head back over to Conversion Diary. Thanks for hosting!

The Power of Doing

I came to an astounding realization today while driving home from school. Really. I think I have figured out the solution to 99% of life's problems. It is surprisingly simple, so simple, that no one thinks to do it.

Let me give you a little background on myself and my personality. Generally speaking I love to dream about the "what ifs" in the world and in my life. All the time I see people and I am so amazed my their skills and their perseverance, and I strive to act in a similar way.

I often think, wow their house is so neat and tidy, one day I would love to be an OT, wouldn't it be so cool to have a blog... etc. I spend a lot of time figuring out how to do these things. For example, I have checked out countless books on cleaning, googled housekeeping tips an embarrassing number of times, and guess what? None of this got my home clean.

The only thing that got my home clean, was well, cleaning it! Shocking I know!

I realized that I can't wish my dreams into existence, in fact, I can't even pray my dreams into existence. It's not God's job to make magic happen for me, while I just sit around and be lazy. I can pray for persistence, patience and a strong work ethic. I can ask God to guide me through what I have to do and what I should do, but in the end I have to actually do it.

I have to clean, to make my house clean. I have to finish OT school, to become and OT. I have to write in a blog, to have a blog.

If only it was as simple as it sounds on paper.

It's Yours, Not Mine

Sometimes I lay awake at night worrying about what happened that day, and what will happen the next day, and the next.

I will hope that my husband will feel fulfilled in his work. I will hope that my daughter will start to listen a little better. I will think about how I could and should be doing more to care for my house, my family and my school work. I will think about the 2 loads of laundry that I didn't get to... Then, if I am lucky, my mind can be directed towards Blessed John XXIII's prayer:

"It's your church, Lord, I'm going to bed"

It's a simple prayer that puts everything into perspective. I alter the prayer to say:

"It's your family, Lord, I'm going to bed"

My daughter, is really God's daughter. My husband, is also God's child. Everything I do, everything I have, is not really mine to take ownership of. It is all God's. So since it is God's, He will take care of it. So, I need not worry.

Sirach and Duties Towards God

Recently I have began reading the book of The Wisdom of Sirach. I think it is a book in the Bible that often is glossed over by many Christians, perhaps because it is not accepted by Protestant faiths. Now in the Catholic Church it has been given the title Ecclesiasticus because the book itself has been used extensively to teach moral codes and faith to catechumens and the faithful.

The entire 2nd chapter is dedicated to teaching people how to be faithful to God. It spells out exactly what are duties are, and what will happen if we do or don't fulfill those duties. I think it is a great starting point for anyone who is just beginning their faith journey.

We are told to:

"Accept whatever befalls you, in crushing misfortune be patient; For in fire gold is tested, and worth men in the crucible of humiliation." Sirach 2: 4-5

I think this is perhaps one of the most difficult lessons to learn. There are times when people of faith turn away from God. I think the thought is often, if God existed, then He wouldn't let this happen to me... So he must not exist. Or to a lesser extent: "God, why are you letting this happen!!" But we are told to be patient. We need to trust in what God has in store for us. Then we are told:

"For in fire gold is tested" 

Gold one of the most precious metals, is tested in fire... which is something that can destroy. But fire doesn't destroy gold, it makes it stronger.

We are told that it works the same way for us. Our "crushing misfortune" really makes us stronger. We can use it to develop patience, tolerance, empathy, and a stronger faith. If we trust God in times of misfortune, we will be rewarded. We are told to:

"Cling to him, forsake him not; thus will your future be great". Sirach 2: 3

I think, looking back on the past few years I have seen this to be true in my own life. Getting married, having a child, moving away to a place where I know no one, starting grad school... they all have had their trials. There have been times where I have found myself frustrated with God. But I find that I have become a much more patient, accepting and empathetic person through all of this.

Thin Moments and Places

A book I am reading, started talking about something that interested me, called a thin place. A “thin place” is traditionally a belief held by Celtic Christians. In short, a it is a place somewhere in the world where a person is closer to God then he or she ordinarily is. It is a special place where a person can truly feel God’s presence. This group of Celtic Christians believe that at any given time a person is usually 3 feet away from God, but when in a thin place a person is even closer!

The idea is intriguing to me, and to some extent I have found it to be true (although I may not believe the 3 ft rule). There are places that I have been, that I have found myself feeling closer to God than usual. Mostly my experience has been somewhere in nature like on a hike (only been on like 2 in my whole life) or at the beach.

My thought is that, more than “thin places” I have had “thin moments”. I will say I am not sure if there is any specific Celtic Christian teaching on thin moments though, but maybe there is! I think a thin moment is a time in your life when you can feel God there and you may not know why.  Here are some of my “thin moments:"

• When my daughter was born
• When I got married
• When I am at the beach
• When I am in Adoration

I realized I have been taught about thin moments my whole life. Back in kindergarden my teacher once told me a secret. I'll let you in on the secret too:

"When you get goosebumps and you are not cold, and you look around and cannot see, hear or feel anything, then it's the Holy Spirit next to you giving you a hug".

Guess what? I have believed it ever since. Whenever I notice I get goosebumps for no reason at all, it always makes me smile and feel like God is watching over me.

Be Kind

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle. - Plato

Yesterday I was stopped at a stop light, waiting patiently to turn left. Then the protected left hand arrow turned green. So I waited my customary 3 seconds and then entered the intersection. Only to swerve out of the way of a car that was going 60 mph, running a red light! The car just missed us. My heart was pounding, and one thousand 'what ifs' were running through my head. 

 I couldn't help but being extremely angry with that person who was so careless. Had we gotten hit at the angle we were driving, my daughter in the back seat surely would have gotten hurt badly. I wanted to yell at them. But the reality was, everyone was safe. No one was hurt. 

Now my thought goes to Plato's quote. I don't know what that person was racing towards. Maybe they just found out someone they knew was in the hospital. Or maybe it was a girl who was upset because her boyfriend broke up with her that she was not paying attention to the light. 

Then I reflect on a time I had been a rude, careless person. 

In high school I finally had my first job, and since I turned 16 I was finally able to be the primary on my own bank account. We spent 3 hours filling out the paperwork the week before to be sure that I had access. Then one day I went into the bank, to take some money out of my account (I didn't yet have a checking), only to be told I did not have permission because I was not a primary on the account. 

I lost it, and yelled at the teller! I told said horrible things to her that I am too embarrassed to write about now. That morning I had gotten in a fight with my mom, because I had bombed a test. The teller didn't know that though. All she could see was that I was a crazy girl screaming at her about something that she did not have control over. 

I went back to the bank 3 days later, and apologized to that same teller. 

I think the point of the story is that, you should always try to give people the benefit of the doubt for poor behavior. Rudeness can sometimes come from a lifetime of being treated poorly, etc. 

Everyone, is always fighting a harder battle in some way or another. This helps me to remember to always act respectful when someone treats me badly.